Category Archives: Boys

Lessons from home

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I was watching EJ today at lunch, and it dawned on me that he has a lot in common with the people that I’m trying to reach and educate about animal agriculture. Bet you’re wondering what in the world am I talking about, eh?

Well, it went something like this:

Me: “EJ, would you like a grilled cheese for lunch?”

EJ: “No mom, me no like grilled cheese.”

M: “Well, what are you going to have for lunch?”

EJ: “Ummm…can I just have some of that (pointing at bread), with that (pointing at cheese) and that (pointing at butter).”

M: “Do you want it cold or cooked?”

EJ: “Cook it up, please.”

M: “Are you sure you don’t just want a grilled cheese?”

EJ: “No, Mom, me don’t like it.”

Yeah, right.

So, instead of having a grilled cheese for lunch, EJ had a sandwich with butter on the outside, cheese in the middle, and cooked in the frying pan. Who am I to argue?

EJs sandwich

No matter what you think, this is NOT a grilled cheese, just ask EJ.

That’s when the light bulb came on for me. Perhaps EJ just doesn’t understand exactly what makes up a grilled cheese, maybe he doesn’t get that I put just as much care and thought into making a grilled cheese as I do his other oddly-similar-to-a-grilled-cheese creation. But then again, he’s only 3, so chances are he’s just be stubborn and acting like a child.

But the same can be said for those that oppose animal agriculture. Maybe they don’t understand what is really happening on the farm, which is why I’m out here, in cyber-world, inviting questions, comments, showing videos, etc., trying to teach those that don’t know, what actually happens on the farm.

Maybe they don’t understand just how much of their day-to-day supplies and activities rely on those of us in agriculture…and not just animal agriculture, but all of farming. (If you’d like to take a look, you can check out some information on beef here: http://fitperez.com/2010-10-26-interesting-picture or here: http://www.beef.org or on agriculture here: http://www.csrees.usda.gov/index.html)

Maybe once there are more farmers/ranchers/agriculturalists out in the public’s eye, maybe then there will be fewer insults and ridicule, and more trust and compassion.

Or maybe some are just acting like children.

Before you know it

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Well, it’s official, Christmas is almost here. Yikes. I guess I better get some cheer on!

Unfortunately, that’s easier said than done. My tinsel is dull, my carols are out of tune and my tree seems to be missing its bling. I need a serious intervention.

I think part of my problem is that I’ve been so keyed up about the doctor’s visits and all that, that I’ve forgotten to sit back, relax a bit and enjoy each day…so that’s my goal this week.

I’m not going to worry about what the new year is going to bring. I’m not going to worry about things I can’t control…at least for a few days.

I will enjoy my children, enjoy my family, enjoy the holiday and remember the reason for the season, by thanking God for all of the gifts that I have been blessed with.

Maybe if I simplify and relax a bit, I will find my Christmas spirit and will celebrate whole-heartedly along with my children and watch the magic unfold before their eyes.

That’s the biggest blessing of all.

The season of giving

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We are sitting here in Rochester, xrays yesterday, an appointment or two this morning, more this afternoon. While watching a commercial in our hotel room (Boss Man and George were both snoozing), a thought crossed my mind.

It wasn’t just a thought, though, it’s become an obsession of mine…and I’m wondering what it would take to put it into action.

I was watching a re-run of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition on CMT when a commercial came on. It showed a poor kitty with a cast and a forlorn looking puppy, claiming to need your money to have a happy Christmas. And it bugged me.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I fully understand the need for shelters and places that will take care of animals that have nowhere else to go. I fully support each and every person donating time and supplies and funds to local shelters, where they can see their money doing good work.

My issue is with organizations, such as HSUS, who spend a majority of their money on other things, such as lobbying, rather than actual care of animals.

Why is it bugging me?

Here I am, sitting in one of the highest regarded care-centers in the world. I’m trusting them with my 19-month-old son’s future, and the physician (who is respected in her field of practice across the world) looks me in the eye and says, “Your son, he puzzles me. I have no answers.”

And I wonder to myself, how could the funds that HSUS is wasting on high-rises and pension plans change that answer?

I watched the Extreme Makeover: Home Edition episode. It was about a child with cancer, who makes bracelets to help raise funds for cancer research.

Here, in the middle of the episode, runs a commercial to “help” animals by donating money every month to an organization that does very little to help any true hands-on facility. They want you to look at these poor kitties and poor puppies and feel guilty for spending a holiday warm and comfy, when they don’t have such luxuries. But all it did was make me mad.

Here, during a show that told the story of children that may not see Christmas, that may have to spend their holiday in the confines of a hospital room, they want you to send money to lobbyists? Gives you the warm fuzzies, eh?

We continue our appointments this afternoon, with the next on the list being a neurologist. I don’t know where we will go from here, but I’m almost certain that we will be fortunate enough to leave here in the next day or so. We may not have answers, but we will be home and we will be together for the holiday.

If you must give money to animals, and wish to do so every month, please, consider your local animal shelter. At least you’ll know where your money is going.

And if you feel even more giving, perhaps donate your funds to medical research. Some families are not going to be as lucky as we are. But if enough money is donated, maybe there will be fewer I-don’t-knows and more here’s-our-plans.

That’s my Christmas wish.

Sure is Monday

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Yep, Monday reared her ugly head. Went to have Eli’s pre-appointment blood work drawn, and decided to kill two birds with one stone and take Evan in to have him checked over. (We’ve spent a lot of time on antibiotics lately, 5 days of amoxicillin, 5 days of zithromax.)

The tests came back and Evan has strep. Woohoo! We won the jackpot! Ten days of augmentin! Yippee! If that doesn’t give him a flaming case of antibiotic butt, nothing will. Yogurt, here we come. (Normally meds don’t make you jump for joy, but when you can’t do anything else, you might as well celebrate…right???)

Eli has a double ear infection. No big deal, since he’s not symptomatic, but we’ll have to watch it. (Much like our animals, I don’t give my kids antibiotics for no reason.) But the fluids could be part of the reason that he doesn’t talk. Sooooo…just because it’s Monday, we got to discuss surgery. Not just one, but two! YAY!

If Evan’s meds don’t work this time (or he isn’t successful in the self-tonsil removal), we’re probably looking at having his tonsils removed sooner rather than later. Since the doctors and insurance companies seem to have a thing going, I’m guessing it will be right after the first of the year. But since we never have any problem with meeting our deductible anyway, I figure, the sooner, the better. (And, by the way, I LOVE telling the office that we have no copay for visits…”Sure, go ahead, schedule 14 follow-up appointments, schedule away my dear!”) Just kidding…kinda.

And in 3 months if he happens to check and Eli is having an infection, or fluid build up, in his ears, we will schedule tubes, health permitting. *sigh* poor kid, can’t catch a break. But out of the last 10 times his ears have been checked, 8 times he has had infections, or fluid. He has only passed one out of three tympanograms, so I guess that’s enough proof for me. Plus the doctor hopes that it may be the key to getting his words to come out. And I’d love to hear “Mama” again! (I’ve heard it once, at a Farm Bureau YF&R meeting, of all things!)

Oh, on a positive note, I got to talk to two lovely ladies about the Humane Society of the United States while picking up my wreath from the local crisis center for their fundraiser. I know of one organization that’ll be short some funds this next month! Woohoo! And, donations are now being DIRECTLY given to a local shelter.

See, Mondays aren’t ALL bad…just mostly! 😉

Par for the course

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Winter reared its ugly head just in time for Thanksgiving. But that didn’t stop us from making the 2 1/2 hour trek to Fargo and spend the day with my sisters and their families, as well as shopping for a whopping 19 hours straight on Friday! I tell ya, having four boys does get me in training for some of the finer moments in life!

We came home Saturday and enjoyed a lazy day at home. Then I took my foster-Grandpa to bingo (his favorite thing to do) and enjoyed a quiet night without the kids at home. Woohoo! (They stayed at my Mom and Dad’s.)

On Sunday, we planned on being in church, which starts at 10. Boss Man left the house at 8-ish, thinking he would have “plenty” of time to feed the cows and get the chores done prior to having to leave by a little after 9 (remember, our boys are at my folks’).

Well, I should have known that things wouldn’t go as planned. The morning went in typical fashion. Boss Man pulled back into the yard with the tractor at 9:40. It’s a 15 minute drive to town and we don’t have our boys yet. Plus, I still have their church clothes with me at home. So, needless to say, the cows won that one and we weren’t able to go to church. But, I did get the boys to Sunday School! Yay for a small victory!

Then last night EJ managed to turn a pen and a plastic tube from a toy into a lethal weapon and punctured a hole above his tonsil. Yep, that’s how I roll.

Cheers to 2011!

Different kind of thanks…

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My second “thankful” post will give you a list of ten things that I am glad that my boys have taught me. Some more so than others, LOL!

1) Good things come in small packages. So, so true. I cherish every moment that I was able to spend rocking my sons, holding them close, knowing that they relied on me for everything. It was overwhelming at times to think about, but I never regretted a single second of it.

I so miss these days! *snuggles*

2) When something’s out of reach, keep climbing. Now, for the most part, this wasn’t a lesson that I enjoyed them learning. Mostly because it involved things like trying to hide candy on top of the refrigerator unsuccessfully…and finding out I was unsuccessful by catching a 2-year-old on top of the fridge, eating candy.

3) What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger. Well, if not, it at least teaches you some pretty valuable lessons. For instance, eating a wart off your foot doesn’t need a trip to the ER, even if you had wart remover on it. Although, the Ask-A-Nurse line and Poison Control Center will try their best not to gag and/or laugh at you for explaining, and re-explaining, and then explaining once more to whomever they can get near-by to listen in and give a “second opinion” on the situation. Scooter truly does have a stomach of steel, I swear.

4) Doctors don’t know everything. Yeah, I knew this before, but there’s something about the top medical clinic in the world telling you, “Hey, there’s something wrong with your son, but we haven’t a clue as to what it really is,” that makes you sit up and take notice. But I’ve quickly learned that the one True Physician knows all and can perform miracles when least expected. I truly thank God each and every day.

5) Life with boys is never-ending excitement. Well, let’s just say that the scenery is never the same, and the stuff they pull is ALWAYS amazing me. Really? Why would I ever think that a 2-year-old would hide in a dryer? Why would a 3-year-old fill the washing machine with milk replacer? In fact, life is so hectic at times, I’m adding 6) Life is never a dull moment.

Things like buckets of toads, being dropped on my floor.

7) Love for a child is immeasurable. There is nothing…I repeat, n o t h i n g, that I would not do to save my sons from pain or being hurt. I never understood what people were talking about until the day that I found out that we were expecting Big Bro.

8) Laugh. Every day if you can. Where would we be without enjoying the little things? I shudder to think.

Plus, you can take embarrassing pics of your kids before they're old enough to tell you no!

9) Sometimes the words “Thank You,” mean more than words can describe. When Big Bro told me “thank you” this week, for being a great mom, I will relive those moments for years to come. And so to you, my readers, I say “Thank you.” Thank you for following my crazy life, coming onto our farm, learning about our family and our industry, and being willing to share it with others. I do all of this to ensure that my sons have the same types of opportunities that my husband and I were blessed to have, but without you, I am nothing but a voice in a void. Thank you.

10) Tomorrow will not be today. I do not know what it will bring, but I know that it won’t be the same as today. And that’s OK. It has to be, because if I’m not OK with that, it doesn’t matter, it’ll happen anyway!

Ah, this life with boys is a crazy one, but I wouldn’t change a minute of it…well…

All it takes…

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Today was a great day in church. Besides the normal feeling of well-being and all-is-right-with-the-world, today was extra special.

During the greeting part of our church service, a lady in our church came up to Big Bro and said to him, “You know, you are just a really great big brother.” I could hear his heart swelling as she said it. And it brought tears to my eyes.

In an era where people hardly take time to say hello to each other, let alone stop and visit, it was wonderful to have someone actually come and make such a warm and wonderful comment to our oldest son.

And to let you in on a little secret about Big Bro, he’s very, very sensitive. He doesn’t like to rock the boat, he wants to blend into the background and not draw attention to himself. He worries about things that 8-year-olds should never worry about. For instance, just this week he was having one of his “hard days.” He was concerned about making a plan for his future. He’s not sure what he wants to be when he grows up, and if he doesn’t get that figured out, how will he ever support a wife and kids! Yeah, deep thoughts for 8.

I’ve always said that Big Bro is an old soul in a young man’s body. He thinks about feelings, and is very, very respectful to anyone older than him. He struggles with wanting to play with his friends and be a young, wild boy or being responsible and making sure that no one gets out of hand.

I can only imagine how exhausting that would be.

On top of that, add a seizure disorder that limits his ability to be involved in certain activities. Medicine that is taken daily. And the constant wonder if “something is wrong with him?” I do what I can to appease his worries, but I’m just a mom, so what do I know?

But here’s the best part…days like today. That comment not only made his day, but it made mine as well. And we will relive it for days to come. And I agree, he is an AWESOME big brother!

First grade drama

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Last night Scooter came home from school in tears. To clarify, this isn’t unusual. Scooter is a very sensitive boy…which makes him an easy target at school. And he’s a very large boy, which makes him a very big target at school. (And I don’t mean obese, I mean being 5 feet tall, 90 pounds at the age of 6, wearing a size 12 pant, size men’s 6 shoe and almost the same size cap as his dad!)

Big Bro (left) and Scooter when Scooter was still the little brother.

I’ve been seeing a lot of articles lately on bullying and the like, and I know exactly what these parents are going through. I watch it with my children frequently. But last night was rough, even by Scooter standards.

Big Bro on his tippy toes to take a pic with his big-little brother after a wrestling match.

He was upset because he says that no one in his class likes him. Come to find out, it’s because of his lack of getting smelly stickers on his papers. He thinks that means that his classmates don’t like him, that his teacher doesn’t like him, that school does not like him. We talked about it at length, I tried to explain to him that the stickers had nothing to do with how much people liked him and everything to do with his attention and detail in his schoolwork.

But for Scooter, school is merely a social event. The work is just the fluff he goes through to be able to socialize and be amongst the people. And that is also why any discouraging comments or remarks are exceptionally hurtful.

I was afraid when he started school that his personality would be his biggest stumbling block. He LOVES people…and I mean loves! The good news: he doesn’t share his love with other students. He tries to be mindful of their personal space. The bad news: most teachers enjoy having a student that is excited to see them each day, a student that wants to start and end each day with a hug and a thank you…but when you have a teacher that doesn’t enjoy those things, that’s when times get a little rough.

We’ll muddle through this, the best way I know how…but if you have any suggestions, please, don’t hesitate to throw them my way!

Not your everday mom

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I was told this morning that Big Bro and his friends think that I”m weird. And I guess it’s kind of a good thing.

Let me explain:

In our family, the family dynamic is a little off. Boss man takes care of most of the farming stuff, the cattle stuff, etc. When I can, I pitch in and help wherever needed (such as driving silage truck). On the flip side, I do kid duties, school duties and house stuff. He pitches in when I force him to. (Just kidding!…kinda)

That’s a pretty normal scenario for a lot of families, especially a lot of farm families with young children. So where do we differ? Well, for the most part, I’m the one that takes the boys fishing, hunting, playing sports, etc.

Apparently this makes me weird to a bunch of third graders.

It’s a family tradition. My dad took us hunting and fishing from a very, very early age. It was a family event and everyone was involved. I’ve always wanted that experience for my children…and so we began.

With George’s frequency at the doc’s office, I haven’t been able to take them out as often as I would like this year…but we’ll make up for it in years to come…I know it. And we’re already scoping out deer for deer season.

And don’t worry about me taking out the best and brightest of the animals, because if a deer is dumb enough to come close to my mini-van full of yelling, screaming kids trying to tell me that the deer is coming towards us while I’m trying to quietly “sneak” out of the vehicle without alerting the deer as to my whereabouts while wearing a large amount of blaze orange and shushing my children…well, that deer is probably at the shallow end of the gene pool and should be culled from the herd. The good news is that intelligence does not effect the taste…so the sausage will taste just as good! 😉

There was a year, quite a few years ago, that I was able to go out at daybreak, all by myself, and boss man would stay home with our (at that time) two young children and I was able to pretend that I was a real hunter. I even had that one mounted!

Apparently being a mom that hunts makes me weird. I can live with that.

And yes, I know how to field dress a deer. And no, I don’t expect anyone else to do it for me. So, in a few weeks, the boys and I will pack up our gear and after school we will drive around and see if we can secure our sausage source for the upcoming year.

Just one more reason that I love our farm.

Just a regular childhood accident

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Yesterday didn’t quite go as planned, but I do have to say that most of my days aren’t “planned” for this exact same reason. If you don’t have plans, then you can’t be upset by not going through with them…right??? 🙂

Anyway, just a little before lunch time I received this call from the school:

“Val?”

“Yes.”

“This is (so-and-so) from the school. Ummm. There was a small accident involving Scooter and the slide and, well, he’s got quite the goose-egg on his forehead. Can you come in and take a look?”

“Yeah, let me load up the others and I’ll come in. It’ll be about 20 minutes.”

“OK, we’ll have him in the office. We’re icing it.”

Let me tell you, from my experience, if the school is calling to have you “take a look” at a wound when you live out of town, chances are a trip to the doctor is going to be called for…and it was.

The good news is it was just a mild concussion, we avoided the CT scan (Wagner heads are EXCEPTIONALLY hard…I’ve always known it, and now I have proof!) and Scooter is back at school today, complete with battle wound to show off to his friends.

Although it was a few hours ate up out of my day, it was a relief to have just a “normal” childhood accident.

And the new pediatrician was pleased to meet one of my other children…not just George. His comment on meeting Scooter? “Boy, he’s a big boy!” And just for the record, Scooter is 6, weighs 88 pounds and is 56″ tall. Little George and him make a GREAT pair! 🙂